Monday, January 17, 2011


I need some advice, desperately. 
I'm actually surprised I lasted this long on the blog without asking for this help, but I am in desperate need.

My husband is very negative.  Very rarely, anything positive comes out of his mouth.  On the way home from work today, I listened to Joel Osteen's service  from yesterday, and it was about taking the the sand you are given and making it into a pearl.  Rough things happen in your life to teach you.

I cant see Todd doing this.  One statement that was made was that one needs to look back over the past several years.  Has your attitude changed?  If not, then you need to GROW UP.
I completely agree.  And to be honest, Todd's hostility towards others and his negative attitude is exactly the same as it was when we first met.

He talks badly about my boss when I tell him something that was said at work.  My friend and her husband who came over on New Years Eve, he makes fun of the way they live (talking about he is going to buy them a year's worth of food for next year: a box of crackers and cheese because they dont eat much, and those are their favorite foods.)  It seems like anytime I have something to say, he comes up with a negative comeback.   Everyone on the road is a bad driver.  He acts like everyone is out to get him. do I say something without saying it in a way that will cause an arguement?
He is miserable about his job, but he talks about the people from his job in such a negative way.  Maybe it's HIM.  He does not like his half-sister because she is a bit crazy.  But the way he talks about her just breaks my heart.  He has spoken of her in this way since we've met.  It just bothers me.

All of this is mentioned in daily conversations with my husband.  It really wears on me, and is part of the reason we went to counseling last year.

So what do I do?
What do I say?


  1. First of all...pray for him...daily! The next thing to do is realize you can't change him...only God can do that. My advice would be to try to always stay positive in your takling with him...come back with a positive when he has a will be giving him a Godly example to follow...don't show anger towards him as it will fuel the fire and increase his negative feelings. Lots of hugs and kisses...let him know to (gently) please not talk like that around you as it upsets you...don't be harsh...then just be positive! I'll pray for you in this! Love ya!

  2. All very good points. THANK YOU. I knew I could count on ya to give great advice. I should have just PMed you. Love you.

  3. You are VERY welcome, Meg. It makes my heart sing to see you growing in the Lord!