The Little Things

It is hard to believe that Squiggy has been gone for 3 weeks.  Sometimes, I wonder if he was ever here.  We have so many great memories, but it seems like he’s been gone for so long.

But then there are daily things that I do that remind me of him.  For instance, I was cutting an apple at work the other day for a snack.  Squiggy loved apple cores.  I would bring them home for him every day.

When we walk into the house, Squiggy’s ashes are there on the half-wall we have between the Living Room and Kitchen area.  The crematory gave us a glass pig that we have on top of the box that Squiggy’s ashes came in.  Out of habbit, I pet the glass pig on the head and touch the tail hair that they saved for us.  I am so thankful they saved that for us. 

I am surprised at how emotional Todd still gets about Squiggy.  He has a hard time talking about the pig-man without getting teary eyed.  I am also surprised how little emotion I’ve had at his loss.  I cried for a couple of days, and then I get tears at times thinking about him (like right now,) but surprisingly, I have taken his death pretty well.  He WAS my baby boy, and there will be no other animal like him.  But I think that I cried enough (bawled is more like it) while he was sick for three weeks to prepare me for his death when Todd was trying to keep it together.

It is hard to call our homestead a “mini-farm” any longer without Squiggy.  It’s just not the same without him.  We have no plans for another porker. 

RIP Squiggy Maroo

Today, my beloved pig passed away.  He passed away after being sick for a little over three weeks, and the vets not knowing what was truely wrong with him.  I'm glad he's not suffering any longer, but I already miss him so much.  I love Squiggy so very much.  He had such a personality.

These are a few pictures of him.  I have so many great visions in my head of him in Spring and Summer following me around the yard.  Him lying on his side waiting for belly rubs.  Him soaking up the sun and loving every minute of it.

I hope he knew how much I loved him.
I'm sad that I wont get to see that adorable tail wag any longer.  No more apple cores or watermellon rinds for him.  But I know he is at peace.

Todd was home today and made an apparatis (sp?) to keep Squiggy upright.  Around 2 today, while I was at work, Squiggy took his last breath.  Todd was laying with him when he took his last breath.  Todd didnt want to tell me while I was at work or on my way home from work.  I am thankful for that.

At any rate, this is how I am going to remember the love of my life.
There will never be another Squiggy...

I love you, Squiggy Michael Maroo Crispin.  I will never stop loving you.

I THOUGHT I was Overwhelmed Before! HA!

This week has been a rough one for us.  Todd has been super-man for me by taking care of Squiggy, watching him, keeping his temperature at the right levels, giving him shots, force-feeding him through a turkey baster (after all, Squiggy IS pig-headed!)  He really has taken over quite a bit.

However, this week, Todd got S-I-C-K.  He has strep throat again…for the 6^th time since we’ve been together.  He gets strep at least once a year and has since he was a child.  He probably should have had his tonsils out a long time ago, but we are looking into having them out now, as an adult.

Since being sick, he’s done nothing but sleep.  He’s slept more in one night than he usually does in 3 days!  That being said, I have had to take over pretty much everything.  Cleaning up, dishes, taking care of Squiggy, Squig’s laundry (which is about a load a day or more right now,) Todd’s laundry, my laundry, take care of Lana, and the 4 cats.  Oh, and that is on top of going to work for 10 ½ hours a day.  The first night, I was exhausted and in bed by 8:30.

The second night, I had a load of Todd’s laundry that needed washed and dried for work the next day, a load of Squig’s soiled bedding (he cant walk so he wets himself,) an 8 ½ month old rambunctious puppy to play with and get her energy out of before bed, a piggy to be fed by hand and loved, dinner to prepare, a dishwasher to unload and reload, and several birthday cards to prepare and send out in the mail.

I also promised someone at work that I would look over his taxes for him.  H&R Block was going to charge him $240 to do his (simple) return, and I thought I may be able to do it.  Now, I feel pressure to get it done, and I have so much else going on.

The first day of going through all of this, I was a real bear (to put it nicely.)  I was stomping around making it known that I was not happy about the situation.  That night (Monday,) I prayed to God to take all of the stress off of my shoulders, help me to change my attitude, and He did.  I woke up Tuesday morning feeling renewed and ready to take on the day!  The stress disappeared.  The responsibilities didn’t disappear, but God took away my stress and worries and enabled me to get everything that needed to get done, done.  I was able to make every minute count and accomplish what I set out to do.

It is amazing how much more peace I feel when I know God is on my side, working WITH me.  Sometimes, I try to take the reigns of everything, but I need to trust in Him.  It will always work out when I put my faith in Him.

I Have an Amazing Husband

It has been mentioned (on more than one occasion,) that my marriage to Todd was not always the most pleasant.  There was a time that we both agreed that we wanted to get divorced; however, we decided to give it one last go before breaking our marriage vows.  We went to a counselor for a few months, learned a lot about one another and how we cope with many things, etc.  Since then, it has been pretty smooth sailing.  I strongly believe that every couple should go through pre-marriage counseling BEFORE getting married.

That being said, I want to let everyone out on the world wide web know that I have an amazing husband. 

Squiggy is deathly ill right now.  He is suffering from hypothermia (even though his house is 65 degrees,) along with a possible hip or back injury (the vet thinks he may have slipped and fallen on the ice.)  When we were giving him steroid shots, he was doing better.  He would stand up, and at least eat and drink if we gave it to him by hand.  Then, last weekend, he wouldn’t even get up.  He has been lying in the same position for several days now.  Some days, he wont even open his eyes to look at us.  Those are BAD days. 

The vet came on Wednesday for the second time to see what he could do.  Unfortunately, he couldn’t do much.  He stated that he was surprised that Squiggy was still alive.  Hypothermia will shut down the organs of an animal, and they don’t generally last a week and a half as Squiggy has.  Well, we knew we had one stubborn pig.  They don’t say someone is “pig-headed” for nothing!

Todd has been doing an awesome job of taking care of Squiggy. He has gone above and beyond…considering, he really doesn’t necessarily LOVE Squiggy as I do. 

I do not generally cry.  I am not one of those girls who cries about the littlest thing.  The last time I sobbed was this week due to Squiggy, but before that, it’s been over a year when Todd and I spoke of divorce.  The vet came out on Wednesday, and Todd was nursing Squiggy throughout the entire day.  Thursday, I got a text from Todd stating that Squiggy was doing worse.  His temperature kept dropping instead of going up.  He refused to even drink the Gatorade we were told to give him. 

I started doing research online, and I saw that dehydrated pigs do not live very long.  It was mentioned that a vet should come out to the house and possibly put an IV in Squiggy, or he should be put to sleep.  I called Todd (which is again, something I don’t normally do from work.)  I was crying and I told him I didn’t know what to do.  The thought of losing my precious pigger absolutely kills me.  PBP’s (pot bellied pigs) live up to the age of 19 or 20!  3 ½ is WAY TOO YOUNG for him to pass. And I also was thinking about the last time I saw him up and walking around, before he was sick.  He had too much life in him to be like this within two weeks.  It is very difficult for my brain to process.

Within a half hour, Todd texted me stating that Squiggy was drinking for him!  Within two hours, Squiggy drank a quart of Gatorade, which is equal to 600 calories.  Mind you, the pigster has not eaten anything in several days now, and would drink only a few sips when we fed him through the turkey baster.

Todd texted me stating that he had pretty much given up on saving Squiggy.  He didn’t know what else he could do.  He covered the pig in a heating blanket, had it set on high, have heat lamps on him, but Squiggy was not getting any better (nor was his temperature going up.)  Todd stated that it was hearing me cry over the phone that gave him the motivation to keep working on the pigger.  Within minutes, Squiggy was actually drinking from the turkey baster.  He was also able to take a couple of tablespoons of corn syrup from a wooden spoon.

When we got piggy, we were told not to give him too many sweets because he would refuse to eat anything else.  But we were informed by the vet to give him the Gatorade and corn syrup so that his glucose levels would increase, therefore making his metabolism work, and by his metabolism working, his body temperature should go up.  Also, the sugary drink and syrup gives him much-needed calories because he’s not eating.

1 quart of Gatorade is more than Squiggy has had to drink in 2 or 3 days.  As you can see, that is a huge accomplishment.

Yesterday when I got home from work, it was so nice outside.  I kept thinking that it’s a shame that Squiggy is sick, because he would have loved walking around the yard, eating grass and some treats that he and Lana had missed out in the yard last year (pumpkin parts, apple cores, etc.)  Hopefully, one day soon, he will be up and running again. 

PS – and how many women can say their husband spent all day nursing a pig AND had dinner on the table by the time she got home?  I’m one lucky girl.

Exhausted, Lazy & Overwhelmed

The past week and a half has been a rough one for us.  Squiggy is still sick, VERY sick, more sick than he’s ever been. The vet came to our house earlier last week and gave him a few shots, and then left some with us.  Within a couple of days, Squiggy appeared to be doing better.  He was even walking around a little for us and eating.  Then, this  past weekend, he took a turn for the worst.  He hasn’t stood up in days, nor has he eaten. 

Todd has been a trooper, taking care of our baby boy.  It is strange, but I cant be with Squiggy for too long when he’s like this.  It tears me up inside, and I kind of distance myself.  Todd has stepped it up and taken over where I usually have when it comes to spending time with Squiggy and taking care of him.   

It is amazing how a slight change can mess up the routine of life.  I feel like all we do is worry and talk about Squiggy.  Todd goes in to check on him twice throughout the night, I check on him twice in the morning before I leave for work (and try to give him some liquids,) and then twice in the evening when we get home from work.

Todd realized how exhausted I have been without me even realizing it.  I didn’t realize how must stress of a sick piggy has put on me.  I have felt like a zombie.  I have done nothing but sit and veg out.  I have a stack of paperwork that I need to take care of (home owners insurance, car insurance, hospital bill, tax return paperwork, etc.) that has been sitting on a table for about a week.  I cant even bring myself to go through it and pay the bills.  I haven’t been able to sit down and read for any amount of time, and when I do, I don’t comprehend it because I am not paying attention.

The house is a complete and utter disaster.  There is paperwork everywhere, stuff lying all over the house, and it is just a 100% mess.

The vet is coming out to the house again to diagnose the piggy.  Hopefully, he will be on the mend soon.  This weekend, Todd will be working.  I am planning on trying to clean up as much as I can and get some of these tasks taken care of. 

MIA

I'm sorry I havent blogged for a little while.  Things are pretty stressful here right now with our ailing piggy.  It has taken most of our time taking care of him, worrying for him, and the like.  The vet will be out again today (for the second time.)  I hope they have a better diagnosis. 

I have posts on a flash drive, but havent had a chance to copy and paste.  That is how exhausting it has been around here.  I cant think or do anything that requires any brain activity.  I've been a vegetable for about a week.

Hopefully, I'll be back soon.

Squiggy Status

The vet has no idea what is wrong with my cute little Squiggy piggy.  Apparently, the vet couldn’t take his temperature because he was reading colder than her thermometer had available (90 degrees,) which is unusual considering pigs generally are warmer animals.  So, she gave him two shots in the tuckus (butt) and left us with 6 shots to give him throughout the week.

What a joke that is.  When Squiggy had pneumonia, Todd administered the first shot but was out of town with his dad the next day, and I had to do it.  Pigs are smart.  He knows that if you are coming at him with a needle, he’s gonna get it in the butt.  So he runs and screams.  Todd is aware that he is the one that will be administering the 6 shots to my poor little baby.

The vet is not sure what the problem is.  He does not have pneumonia from what she can tell.  After these antibiotics kick in, he should be either better or cured.  The vet mentioned he may have hurt his back or hind legs (which is why he’s having a hard time walking on his back hooves.)

All in all, the visit didn’t cost too much.  However, if Squiggy isn’t better by the end of the week, she will have to come out again for another visit.

Money

Why does it seem that when we get “extra” money to be able to pay down debt, SOMETHING always happens to deplete the stash that has been saved up?  Why?

Todd received his tax return a few weeks ago and he was able to buy Spring tires for both cars that he has wanted.  The rest of his return was put toward debt.  Then, Squiggy got sick within days of buying the tires and paying down some debt.  When Squiggy gets sick, it’s an expensive vet bill.  It costs $75 to have a vet come to the house, and then whatever is administered, and a lot of times, another visit the week after (which is another $75 bucks minimum.)  Of course, because I paid down a debt, I didn’t leave too much money in our account, so I am freaking that the vet visit will be more than $300 (we have $350 to live on this week.)  And we still have several more days until payday (thank goodness Todd gets paid every week!)

Oh, and the Home Owner’s Insurance that I thought was coming due in AUGUST came in the mail.  That is another $525 that I wasn’t prepared for (my own fault!)  Yes, we have our Emergency Fund, but I don’t like touching that.  I’d rather live VERY TIGHT over the next few weeks and deal with it; which is exactly what we are going to do.

I adore my Squiggy piggy and pray that nothing is seriously wrong with him. 

Meet Squiggy

Squiggy was given to me as a “surprise” from my mother.  I love my mother to pieces, but what was she thinking?!?!?  She remembered a time 5 years before that I saw a pot bellied pig at a pet store and commented on how cute it was.  Well, she had the opportunity to get one from a patient of Doc’s (my mom’s husband,) and she jumped on it!  This was less than 6 months after Todd and I were married (October 2007) and trying to renovate our home.  Needless to say, Squiggy was a thorn in our marriage for some time.  We were not expecting a “child” so soon and were completely caught off guard. They say that pot bellied pigs are like 2 year olds…their entire life!

This is a picture of Squiggy the day after we got him (please note, the date is wrong on these photos).

 Yes, the floor in our house was that color orange before we re-did the room! Squiggy eventually grew into that snout.  He was an adorable 8 lb. piglet when we got him.

 In this picture, he was approximately 7-9 months old.

Do you see how big he got?  Pigs grow until they are 3 years old!

This is Squiggy at about a year and a half.

This is Squiggy Michael (Marroo) today.  He just turned 3 this August, and should be at his maximum weight capacity!

A lot of people ask if I wished he was small again, and I would say ABSOLUTELY NOT!  I love that he is grown up, goes potty outside by himself (he can open doors to let himself in and out to go potty), and he is very independent.  He is such a “ham” and is always making me laugh.  I love going to kiss him and he squeals.  I love lying in front of the fireplace with him (this picture taken Christmas Eve 2008) and falling asleep with us cuddling.

When we last weighed him (last year,) he was over 200 lbs. 

He is my baby boy…and always will be.