There are approximately 15 blogs that I follow regularly. I enjoy reading them, but at times, they make me feel bad about not only myself but our home life. Am I the only one who gets annoyed with blogs that are ALWAYS so upbeat? I wonder if these particular people EVER have a bad day. Do you EVER trip over your own two feet and fall flat on your face like I do? Does your house EVER have ANYTHING out of place? Do you ever cry? Worse yet, do you ever bawl? Do you ever get mad? Are there times that you cant stand being in the same room as your husband?
I will tell you flat out, I am nowhere near perfect. I know that no one is. But there are people who show the world through their websites or blogs that they do no wrong. They feel no sense of pain or disappointment. To me, that’s not real life. At least, that’s not MY real life.
I have friends from high school that I have reconnected with through Facebook. They were not necessarily my best friends but people I enjoyed being with and going out with. I usually hung out with two of my friends, Rachel and Tina. I always felt like the ugly duckling in the group. They were (still are) so beautiful, wore all the best clothes, were very popular, thin, had boyfriends, etc. There was a sweet gal named Brenda that signed up with us three to do kickboxing every week. Rachel’s boyfriend (so handsome!) was the U.S. Champ in kickboxing, and we trained with him as our leader (among a group of 10 other people.) We would take my big beast of a vehicle at the time (because we could all fit into the ’79 Ford LTD) and beat each other up for an hour a week. We had great times working out together, and fun afterwards going out for ice cream and just chatting.
I reconnected with Brenda on Facebook back in 2009, 10 years after graduating from High School. We started talking about life and what we’ve been up to, and she said something along the lines that out of us “3 Musketeers” (as we were called), I was her favorite. She said she never felt like she had to hide anything from me. She said that she could open up to me because she knew I could relate to her so much better than the other two ever could, and that I was more REAL than my other two friends. Oh, and did I mention that I can keep a secret with the best of ‘em?
My friend here at work (who is in her mid-50’s,) has told me more about her life than she’s told her best friend of nearly 40 years. I know her deepest, darkest secrets that her best friend doesn’t even know about. I am honored that she trusted me with them.
I understand your frustration but sometimes blogs aren't designed to be 100% about the authors life. I personally don't think I share all the "perfect" things about my life, I offer glimpses of the imperfection (and there is lots of imperfection!)
ReplyDeleteHowever, I don't view my frugal blog or my family blog as a place to bare my soul to the entire world. Each person has their own comfort level of sharing. I personally do not feel comfortable sharing relationship struggles especially with my husband. I partially leave those details out because I feel they are personal and only between me and my husband but he also doesn't want me sharing all of our personal issues with the world.
I'm not trying to argue with you, I'm just pointing out that some blog authors aren't writing their blog as a personal journal. My family blog mainly highlights Paxton's antics and lots of pictures of him. My Frugal & Simple blog is about frugal and simple living, my readers do not want to read about my marriage issues, my thoughts on weight, etc., they want to read about saving money and living frugally and simply since that is what the blog focuses on.
With that being said, I do love your honesty and reading your thoughts and your heart! I'm sure you have a desire to read the true feelings of other bloggers with regards to everything from in-laws to marriage to weight to bad habits but that's not the purpose of all blogs! :)
Oops. I just read what I wrote (the first sentence,) and it didnt come out right. I meant that I read 15 blogs regularly, and there are a COUPLE that make me feel bad about me. I was not referring to your blog(s), by any means. I hope I didnt offend you.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, you have alot of great points, and I appreciate your honesty.
SB, you sound like me. People say to me, "I have never told anyone this before. I don't know why I am telling you."...about the time she was raped, how she is a lesbian, how he never finished high school...you know, the simple facts of a person's life. It is a burden to hear these secrets and an honor to be so trusted with someone's inner thoughts. But, I know what you mean...I never love reading Little Miss Sunshine's perfect life every day. I don't have to hear all the bad stuff, but give me a little attitude. Make me laugh with the absurdity of your life. Confess your fears and I will know that mine aren't weird. It is all about being human.Someone who is always up or always down is boring. Someone who loves everyone or hates everyone is boring, because it is not normal. It is just plain sad. Nope, it is not normal to love everyone.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment. I was feeling bad last night about being a "loose cannon" and wondering if I should keep to myself more. But that's not really what people in my life love me for. Thanks again.
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